Changes

Spring is here. We have just spent 10 days in the US on vacation. Vacation was good, although coming home was great too. Norway is so much calmer, so much "safer", so much more normal to me than the US will ever be. I miss our friends over there, and of course the family too... But sometimes I appreciate that it is just the two of us, in this city, all by ourselves -with no one to answer to.

With spring come changes. I have decided to leave my job, a decision I do not regret, although I will miss the money -and some of the people. If I could just build my own pharmacy, with my own people... that would be awesome -There are other dreams that are more important though. I will change jobs 1st of July, and it seems that the "new" pharmacy will be opened 15th of July -So I'm kind of sad to miss out on it. I guess you can't dwell on the past, but merely worry about the present (haha).

I feel moody these days. If it's because my period is supposed to come next week, if it's because I'm having some sort of spring depression, lord knows.. I'm just, sad.. Sad that I can't be happy. Sad that I can't make myself feel as great about myself as I should. Why is this ? I don't get it. Again I feel friendless and lonely, even though this current week I've had wine with two old friends, and one new. I've been to a birthday party, I've been invited to another, and there's always a new moose cap Friday around the corner. So why is this ? Why can't I be pleased with what I've got, and what it is that I really want? These questions haunt me, and I truly don't know the answer.... I'm sorry if anyone gets sad because of my writings, but it's the simple truth..

what's wrong with me ?

xoxo

M